Blog #138: Cop-out or Commitment to 10X

What feels like a commitment to you, may look like a cop-out to others.

That’s what happened recently when I called off a new project even before it began.

The project was a new YouTube interview series where I would chat with web designers, freelancers, and content creators. The aim: to help freelancers build and grow their solopreneur business online.

It was exciting. Four people booked to be guests. But as it got closer to getting things organized, I felt this increasing unease. After a day of feeling a knot in my stomach, I called it off.

From the outside, this looks like a cop-out. I seem unreliable and flip-floppy in my decisions. But on the inside, this took courage. Courage not only to write that message to my guests but courage to stay committed to my Unique Ability.

I was committing to my Unique Ability.

What is “Unique Ability”?

At the start of this year, I learned deeply about this idea in the book, 10X is Easier than 2x by Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy. They write that your Unique Ability is “where you have superior skills, where you’re intrinsically motivated and are energized and engaged, and it’s where you see a never-ending possibility for improvement.” It’s about becoming familiar and really clear about what you like and dislike and that your judgments about your experience are completely valid. It’s becoming open to your preferences and not letting other people’s opinions about what you do affect you.

”Unique Ability is qualitative and individual, it’s extremely unique value that only you can create…It’s a combination of a degree of skill as well as an extreme degree of uniqueness.” - Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy

It’s akin to what I have heard Oprah Winfrey in her talks and speeches mention repeatedly when she said, “I want to fulfill the highest, truest expression of myself as a human being.”

But as the authors write in the book, committing to one’s Unique Ability is the “hardest and most intense thing you will ever do.” It’s about taking inventory of where you are investing your time and what activities are taking up your mental bandwidth.

That takes courage. Saying no to invitations is hard. Choosing to work a 4-day week is not easy. Filling up your calendar with the most important items will lead to very little time remaining for anything else. And canceling projects you asked your guests to join, not just once, but twice, does feel awkward.

Facing One’s Ego

Sometimes you’ve got to face your past decisions. The first time I canceled the YouTube interview series was because I had already a very full schedule and I was trying to squeeze-in one more thing into my calendar. I could see that I was moving toward burnout very fast this way. So I dropped the project.

The second time I canceled the project was out of a renewed sense of self-awareness.

"As you develop your Unique Ability...You'll stop forcing yourself to do anything you don't want to do. You'll accept and live by what psychologists call pull motivation, rather than push motivation. When you're pulled by what you want and what excites you, that's freedom and intrinsic motivation. You'll no longer operate based on need, but want." - Dan Sullivan and Dr. Benjamin Hardy

After taking time to reflect on my goals, I realized that starting the interview series was based on a need, not a true desire or want. I was giving in to this idea that creating a YouTube interview series is something I "should" do because I heard or read somewhere that this is a great way to build an audience and grow my business. Although I was excited about meeting the guests and asking them questions, the whole logistics of conducting the series, editing, and putting it all together was something that had begun to drain me. Sure, I can outsource all of that but the project as a whole was making me feel out of my element. I started to get this feeling that I should dye my hair, buy new makeup, and change who I essentially am so I can be “good enough” to host the show!

Changing myself to be “good enough”! Phew! These are all signs that I was embarking on this project because of some idea that was not inherently mine. It was not an authentic desire driving me forward. It came from a feeling that I “should do” this. And that is not healthy or wholesome.

Questions You Can Ask Yourself When Making Decisions

If you are faced with a decision and don’t quite know which path to take, ask yourself these questions. Then assess if a project or a decision is something you want to embark on and if it’s helping you towards your 10x goals.

1. Is this in alignment with my Unique Ability?

2. Is this something that is fun, enjoyable, or inspiring?

3. Will this project help me explore the edge of my 20%?

Letting Go is Part of Embracing The 20%

One of the ideas in the book is about letting go of the 80% to focus on the 20%. This 20% is the edge where you take what you are really good at and get even better. It’s connected to going 10x which is an ongoing process of increasing the quality and decreasing the quantity of what you do. The 20% of everything you do is where the magic lies, allowing you to focus on the 10x goals, and that requires you to focus on fewer things than many.

Letting go more and more of the 80% that takes up your time is essential if you want to go 10x. This doesn’t necessarily mean eliminating it altogether, of course; it can mean delegating to a new hire or automating the tasks. But it is also about letting go of that which is not serving your 10x goals.

Committing to Your Unique Ability

As I read the chapter on Unique Ability in the book, I realized that if I am not enjoying the things I am doing in my business, then I shouldn’t be doing them. Either eliminate or delegate. As soon as I made the decision to call off the interview series, a knot in my stomach seemingly released. I felt at ease. I felt free.

Diving deeper into what inspires me, I realize that what I truly want to do is write and share ideas, insights, and strategies that can help online entrepreneurs and freelancers succeed. It’s not making YouTube interview videos unless I can tap into it from a true desire that brings joy and excitement and I am open to that happening at a later time.

Letting go of something you’ve started is okay. Even if it seems to others as wishy-washy behavior. You are allowed to re-commit to your most important priorities, to your 10x goals, to your Unique Ability. What others think of how you commit your time is none of your business!

I am committing to my Unique Ability.

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